Wednesday, April 19, 2006

Free Range Rant

Squeezed out of Killer's constipated mind:
Many of the rants that I write have a central idea, but are allowed to develop as they are being written. This one, however, has no pre planned idea, or direction.
Writers block is a bitch. I have been meaning to write a blog for over a week now, but have not been able to think of anything to write about. So I am free balling it here, this is off the cuff.
I work in a profession in which everyone has a specific uniform to wear. I don't work at McDonald's or Disney World, but in a hospital. For the last seven years everyone I meet at work is wearing scrubs. Until you run across this in your life you will not realize how much you judge people by their clothes. When everyone wears scrubs every time you see them you never get a full exposure to their personalities. Many times, and I mean MANY, I have met people from work and quickly demised that I would not normally hang out with this person. If a person shows up and is wearing a western shirt, stiff wrangler jeans, pointy cowboy boots, a belt buckle with a rebel flag emblazoned across it, and is a female, this is a personality unlike my own. It is always a great expectation to meet work people and see what their clothes say about it them. This also creates a lot of stress when I am getting dressed to meet people from work. I met a group of workmates this past weekend to see a baseball game. Now, what do I want my clothes to say about me? I usually wear a Hawaiian shirt or some goofy camp shirt or the like, but this is a big occasion. This is my chance to make everyone think I am cool. So, to begin with I took a shower, this is a big deal for me. If I am off work, I don't want to bother bathing. I contemplated wearing cologne, but: A: I would have to dig through a couple of boxes to find some, and B: All the females present are way too good looking to date me. Which takes a great deal of pressure off. As a long shot, I shaved my legs and wore a pink shirt, hoping to make them think I am gay. Amazingly enough, this increases the possibilities of my picking up chicks. Or, when gay guys hit on me, it is a great ego boost and I get to skip going to the gym for a few days.

1 comment:

Cathy said...

Hold on--why are these girls "too good looking for you"? I have a problem with this statement!! Also, I like the way you dress! Don't go changin'.