Saturday, December 24, 2005

Back Tracking

I just went back and posted all the emails from my S.E.Asia journey to this blog. This way future generations can keep better record of how cool I am. It might be tricky, it seems you have to first choose July from the right side menu "archives" in order to see the very beginning.
Thank you for your support
ps: to check out corresponding photos from above mentioned trip check out the photo website.

Friday, December 23, 2005

The Old Man and the C

I have come to realize that I am getting too old for my lifestyle. I am 32. I have reached an age at which people no longer find it entertaining that I stay out late drinking with friends or that I spent the weekend in Vegas gambling. I remember, not very long ago, when I would regale my fellow co-workers about stories of parties gone awry or tales of horrific hangovers that would be met with sly smiles of memories of their own youth. Now I see a different look. A look of concern and consternation. I expect to find pamphlets for AA or local rehab facilities stuffed into my locker at work. I am not sure where the cut off technically is for the youthful lifestyle. I am certain, however that I have surpassed it in the eyes of society. I don't feel guilty and I don't feel old. I just feel the same as I did ten years ago when it would be normal for me to act the way I do. I received an email today from a close highschool friend who now has four children and is a stay at home mom. Am I out of touch with reality? Should I be pursuing the domesticated lifestyle more? If my lifestyle is dangerously close to pathetic now how will it be viewed in ten more years. Is anyone going to find humor in a 42 year old single male, who spends the bulk of his finances traveling aimlessly around the world, drinking local beers and hitting on foreign chicks? I can only hope so since that is the most likely outcome. I fear that this whole lifestyle may be enabled by a sub-conscious fear of "the C-word", commitment. I won't even get a pet because it would be too much responsibility, even just a fish. I currently have a pet plant but even it has caused some problems. I have to find someone to watch it when I go out of town for prolonged periods of time. They need to have pet loaner services for people, like me, who only want a dog for the weekend. These pets would have to be good with people and understand their delicate situation of a fear of commitment and lack of ability to get the needed contact from a regular pet. Sort of like a prostitute, except one that might take a dump on your carpet. I think the prostitute would do that also if you asked her, but it might cost extra.

Tuesday, December 13, 2005


A close friend of mine is planning to send his young, innocent yellow lab under the knife. It appears the vet has recommended that it would be a good idea to remove his testicles. My friend had been fighting this outcome since the lab joined the family, but alas, it has come to an end and poor Duke is going to pay the ultimate price. If removing the testicles from a dog can help to calm it and keep it better controlled maybe we should be applying this principle to our own species. Instead of placing large numbers of children on Ritalin, and other anti-hyperactivity medications, maybe we should just have them spade or neutered. I mean, we are becoming ever increasingly over populated, plus this one time "fix" would be less expensive than years of prescription drug costs. Don't forget the benefit of taking away some income from the evil pharmaceutical companies. When little Johnny won't sit still in class and keeps getting D's on his report card just get his junk removed, and voila, problem solved. The same goes for adorable, sweet Sally. You can't have her going around in heat trying to hump anything that shows up. This is why teen pregnancy is rampant in our society. I am sure Bob Barker would be willing to join the cause. He seems infatuated with having the reproductive organs removed from animals. I personally believe this is the key to his youthful appearance. He is probably 138 years old by now, but he is still doing that TV show. I would not be surprised to find out he has been collecting all these discarded testicles and ovaries and making some kind of magical salve or something that he uses at night when he sleeps in a giant helium filled tank. Having children spade or neutered would not even be all that traumatic for them. It turns out my friend is going to go through with the de-balling of his beloved Duke because of the Ig Noble Prize winning invention, Neuticles. This is an ingenious creation of prosthetic testicles. My friend is going to pay for the replacement of real, free-of-charge testicles for prosthetic testes because he, "does not want to stare at an empty sack hanging from Duke". If this invention is provided for little boys who are neutered at a young age, then they need never know about the whole ordeal. When little Johnny is horrified about having to shower naked in front of the other boys in gym class you can rest assured it will not be due to his "empty sack". You could even do what my friend plans to do and upgrade those babies, and get your kid a really large set of balls. As for sweet Sally, she could not see her ovaries anyway, so no harm no foul.

Friday, December 09, 2005

I Am Pretty

I decided to post a picture so you, my faithful readers can see how beautiful I am. I will take a moment to allow you to drink in the image.
I almost did not post it. I do not want ladies out there getting uncontrollably turned on by the photo.

A New Beginning

He we go, I am stepping into the wonderful world of "blogging". I don't proclaim to have anything worthwhile to say, nor any profound statements. I just usually want to talk, but have no one around to speak with. It will quickly become obvious that my train of thought derails so often, it is probably not a safe way to travel. I have not really researched any other blogs, so don't really know if there are any standards or practices I am supposed to uphold. I checked out a few while setting up this one and I did not really understand what was going on. Several were in foreign languages and the others I could not figure out what the writer was trying to say. There seemed to be lots of one or two sentence entries. I did not feel like investing the time and energy to back track through several old entries to pick up the story line. I hopefully will make all my entries independent and able to enjoy without much work. It seems strange to me that I could sit in my apartment in my underwear writing aimlessly and moments later a middle aged, widower in Sweden can be reading what I have to say. It is a lot of pressure to say something entertaining. What I say could push someone over the edge to kill themselves, or maybe just decide to quit reading blogs altogether. It would be a huge blow to my self esteem if I contribute heavily to the downfall of blogging. It is inevitable since I am always on the tail end of a fad. I was the last kid to wear parachute pants, I listened to hair metal way too long, and I still play with lawn darts. So read quickly and don't admit to your friends that you are. The only thing worse than admitting you have a blog is reading them.

Saturday, September 10, 2005

S.E.Asia Final Log

Well my faithful followers, I have finally rejoined you all in the great U.S. of A. I arrived back in Mississippi on Monday and have been recovering from Jet lag and a general crappy feeling ever since. I have a job interview lined up in Memphis this week and should be back to work in no time. I spent to much money and destroyed many innocent brain cells while in SE Asia. I really recommend you go if you get the opportunity. I have enjoyed writing you all about our adventures and hope you found them informative and enlightening. I would continue them, but I fear that my regular lifestyle could not live up to the adventures regaled upon you from far away lands. They would probably go a little like this:
Hello, I woke up this afternoon and went to work. (if I could insert sound effects right now I would add some crickets chirping, some wind blowing, maybe even a quiet cough from the audience.) well, I then finished working, came home and went back to bed.
Not to thrilling. You will all have to wait until my next trip. Chad, Bam and myself have tentatively scheduled a journey into Africa for next summer.
So in order to end on a positive note I will recap the most important lessons learned on my trip:
1. Although only larger than average here in America, I am freakishly large in S.E. Asia, and they love to point that out. (I can say fat in 4 languages)
2. When in Bangkok if the tuk-tuk drivers ask you if you want "boom-boom" don't be frightened and think they are offering sex with themselves. More importantly NEVER agree to go see the "ping pong show" no matter how curious you become. It is worse than you can imagine.
3. If you are walking by a street food vendor and notice roaches, crickets, grasshoppers, scorpions, grubs or ants in the food, don't make a big deal about it. They are probably supposed to be there, and are apparently a good source of protein.
4. When going through customs of a third world country don't joke around and say, "these baggies full of heroin that I swallowed are making my stomach ache." They don't have much of a sense of humor, and you won't poop right for a week after a cavity search.
5. When eating with the locals don't try to impress the ladies by saying, "I'll have what she is having." See number 3.
6. Bring your own toilet paper. A lot of Asian bathrooms forgo toilet paper, but do offer a water hose next to the toilet. If you are not familiar with spraying your own butt with a hose you are either going to end up with a soaking wet back, or a 2 gallon cold water enema.
I hope all this information is useful in your everyday lives. If you decide to go to SE Asia let me know and I can probably offer up some even more useful nuggets of information.
Thank you all for listening,
traveler extraordinaire

Thursday, September 01, 2005

S.E.Asia Travel log 11

Hola mi amigos, I once again come to you in this magical online world to keep you up to date of our journey. But, I would like to begin by wishing everyone well who is either in the New Orleans/Biloxi areas or has friends or family there. We have been keeping track of the disaster on the news here. I don't believe anyone receiving these emails is currently in New Orleans, but many of you probably have loved ones there.
We are currently in Chiang Mai, which is a small city in Northern Thailand. It is a great city and I recommend it to anyone who ever gets out this way. Yesterday we took a day long trek with a tour group up to a few of the local sites. We went to several water falls and a few local villages that apparently have not decided to move into the new Millineum, hell, many of them have not decided to move into the 1900's. The primary source of income for most the villages like this in the area is from tour groups coming to look at them while they sit around making blankets or necklaces. I guess it beats moving to the big city and being a garbage man, or a nurse. We also were taken to the highest point in Thailand. I should point out that were driven to within 50 meters of the top. There is no way I was going to walk to the highest point. I don't want to walk to the highest point in Mississippi, and that can probably be reached by climbing a ladder onto my house. ANYWAY, back to the point, the problem with the highest point in Thailand is, it is on top of a mountain, but it is surrounded by trees. You would think they would clear a space so you could look out over the rest of Thailand. I am beginning to suspect the guide realized he was running out of time so he just pulled over into the woods and said, "here we are. The highest point in Thailand." We could not look around to verify his statement. He did get us back to town on time, so kudo's to him.
We are flying back to Bangkok in a few hours, and my journey will be coming to an end in a few days. I am will back to the rat race with the rest of you. So, save me some cheese, and don't cure all the patients before I can get back and get a job.
See you all soon

Thursday, August 25, 2005

S.E.Asia Travel log 10

Ten! Ten travel logs. This journey of ours is only is only nine weeks long, so you guys are getting an average of over a letter a week. Man, I wish I had a friend who was so good at corresponding as I am. I think everyone of you who know Chad should take a moment to reflect on how many letters he has sent out. If it is taking you a long time to count them up then you must all be from Mississippi, because it should only be about 2 at the most. I don't see how you guys can put up with him. If I knew anyone else who loved to travel as much as myself, PLUS looks so damn cute in speedos, I would dump Chad.
We have made it back to the great city of Bangkok. We survived the boat ride back from the Perhentian Islands. We were picked up by a REALLY small boat packed with about 15 people. I thought we were over crowded on the first boat, man they really know how to maximize transportation down in South East Asia. I guess when you only charge $4.00 US for a twelve hour bus ride you have the right to pack in the people with a giant shoe horn. Well, we left the islands and took a cab to the border and walked into Thailand, took a train to Hat Yai in Southern Thailand and then took a plane to Bangkok. If any of you have ever seen the movie "Planes, Trains, and Automobiles", if you add a boat then that is what Me and Chad did. The option is to take a train for about 19 hours up to Bangkok for about 10 dollars U.S., or take a 90 minute plane ride for about 35 dollars U.S. Most of the stinky, hippy backpackers that frequent the area probably opt to take the train in order to save money and to "keep it real". But Chad and myself are not hippy backpackers. We might stink, but we are very impatient. We have decided to stay in Bangkok for a good while longer since two of Chad's friends are here from Taiwan. I am slowly going broke, and am going to have to run to the nearest hospital straight from the plane, once back in Mississippi, to make some money.
I work with some nurse recruiters, whom are reading this, that will now be chomping at the bit to get me back to California. (Sitha)
I hope everyone is well.
PS. sorry about not sending anyone a postcard. I think they should make postcards for each place available on the internet, so I can just send you guys a link to see it. Buying the post card is no problem at all, they are sold everywhere. The tricky part is finding someplace that sells stamps, and then finding a place that has a mail box. PLUS, it also helps to have a person actually willing to look for these things.

Friday, August 19, 2005

S.E.Asia Travel Log 9

Hello again. We are back in Malaysia. We are up in the North Eastern Corner on an island called the Perehnthian Islands (that might not be the right spelling). It is great, but getting here was a challenge and I thought we would not make it. But, let me digress.
We left Singapore and went to the rain forest area known as Tamra Negara. It is a national park. We took all day getting there and then quite awhile walking in the blazing sun to find a room in a guest house. There were rooms, but we were holding out for Air conditioning. What kind of full blooded American from the proud and historic southern U.S. would not? We finally found one, but it was for four people with bunk beds. So, we talked down his price and took it. I mean, Chad is three people by himself. If you go back to the last email you can clearly see how fat he is by the picture. The only reason I look bigger is because I am actually closer to the camera. If any of you had paid attention in math during your formative high school years you would know these kinds of dilemmas. So don't always believe what you see. ANYWAY, I am getting on a rant. I did not sleep well last night, so my mind tends to wander.
We trekked into the rain forest area and did what is called the "Jungle canopy walk way". It is an elevated rope walk way that is about 100 yards up. It was about 700 yards long, but was from large tree to tree with little wooden platforms at each tree. It was quite rickety, wobbly, and I was worried for Chad's safety. He is not very graceful and he tends to fall down frequently. Plus, he was carrying all of our cash at the time, so if he fell I would have to climb all the way down and retrieve his wallet, and I am the epitomy of laziness, so that is really a daunting task. I have decided that I should carry the money from now on in case something like that should happen, sorry Chad. We left the jungle area of Malaysia and made our way up the Coast and took a ferry over to the Perehnthian Islands. The water was very rough with huge waves. Our boat was about five people over capacity (a twelve person boat with about 17 people on board) We were forced below deck in order to keep from being washed over board. I kept whistling the theme to gilligans island the entire ride. Many of our boat mates got extremely soaked because the windows on their side of the boat was leaking the entire trip. Chad and myself chose very wisely on the initial dash under the deck. Only my right foot got wet, but I am rather fond of that foot, so it was not a total success. We managed to make it to shore, only two hours later, it was supposed to be a thirty minute ride. Then the boat captain could not pull along side the dock. I was debating jumping over board and swimming to shore, but then some locals came along and pulled the boat to the dock by it's tow ropes. In the morning we noticed another boat of the same size that was wrecked on the shore. I think that was the boat drivers previous vessle. We made it and now we only have to take the same boat back in a few days. I am going to wear scuba gear on the entire ride just in case. Well, I have to go, Chad and myself are about to go Scuba Diving with some local dive group. I know it sounds horrible. I just wish I could be back there with you guys working.
Sarcasm is my middle name
Michael Sarcasm Williams

Saturday, August 13, 2005

S.E.Asia Travel Log 8

Hello from Singapore. We finally made it to Singapore. It is an amazing city. It is the most westernized, you could drop it anywhere in America and it would fit right in, but with a lot more chinese food restaurants, and they will cane you if you do bad things. We spent the first day visiting the zoo area, it was great. I finally had a day without being able to notice how bad Chad smells. They also have a night time zoo, this is like a normal zoo only you walk around in near total darkness and try to spot the animals that are nocturnal, which apparently are the same ones from the day time, except they get up and pace around their respected confines. Chad and I had to fight the urge to strip down to our underwear and hide in the bushes and jump out at the other zoo patrons. The main draw back is that they would not understand why a large furry bear is hanging around with a pale hairless chimpanzee. So, we fought the urge to terrorize the locals, but it would have been so easy.
Last night we managed to find a local brewery! The beer was great and there was a huge crowd there to watch the New Zealand vs. Australia Rugby match. So we sided with the New Zealanders and had a lovely evening bashing the Aussies. The New Zealanders really enjoy Rugby. They were very into it and loved to yell, I think I want to move to New Zealand.
We have tentative plans to head back up into Malaysia tomorrow. We now have to start our long and lazy trek back up towards Bangkok. We only have 20 days left of our vacation, we are starting to feel the squeeze of real life trying to track us down and drag us back.
I have attached a photo of Me and Chad aboard the Junk, our boat we were on for four nights to scuba dive. I hope the photo is not to large for you to open. I don't have my apple computer, and I don't know how to adjust the image size with these damn Microsoft machines. You will notice my bad facial hair (no mustache), I had to cut it off to lessen the leaking of sea water into my face mask. If you can not open it, I will be sending out more photos once I get stateside and can get back to my much missed apple computer.
The minister of Apple propoganda

Tuesday, August 09, 2005

S.E.Asia Travel Log 7

Hello all. We are in Malaysia still, in Melaka. It is a small town on the Western Coast. There is ocean here, but we have not been anywhere near it. I think we are all oceaned out for the time being. We are heading to Singapore tomorrow and then we will spend an undetermined amount of time there. We spent a few days up in the high lands. It was good to be back n the mountains again, but you could really not see them very well. They are building lots of new buildings everywhere blocking up the scenery. It is also apparent that maybe only one group of guys are building all the buildings since they are all only about half built and they only seem to be working on one at a time. There is even a building that looks very similar to Jerry's Fish House in Mississippi. I don't know if they are branching out and opening a franchise in Malaysia, but I am suspicious. We did a hike up to see a water fall, it was not very impressive and we walked about a mile past it thinking there must be a bigger one somewhere further down. We were wrong, so we had to turn around and hike all the way back. I then did the sensible thing and went back to the guest house to rest while Chad decided to hike up the side of a mountain at about a 90 degree angle. I think he is crazy, but he thinks I am lazy so it all works out. Today we took a tour of an old Portuguese war ship. We thought it was just going to be an old ship that has been rebuilt, but we were very wrong. It turns out it is a lovely piece of Melaka/Malaysian propaganda. They basically told the story about how their booming and thriving civilization went from number one in the world to nothing thanks in equal parts to the Portuguese, Dutch and the British. So, if you see any peoples from these countries tell them thanks from Melakans, right after you kick them square in the testes.
I love Melaka
hi, it's chad--just wanted to say hi to those of you who know me and to let you know that i'm managing to survive the toxic fumes that mysteriously appear in our rooms and somehow always originate from killer's side. bye.
lies, all lies

Tuesday, August 02, 2005

S.E.Asia Travel log 6

Hello again. We are now officially in Malaysia. It is a normal country compared to Thailand. We went out for dinner and then out on the town last night and not a single girl in the bars accosted us our wanted us to play any board games with them. I don't know if maybe Chad is becoming more unattractive in his old age, or maybe those girls in Thailand have an ulterior motive. We are in a little town called Georgetown, on the Western coast of Malaysia. It is on an Island, Panang. This area used to be an English settlement, hence the very English name. We are going to stay here for a few days and then head over to the more mountainous region. Finally a place where I can feel at home. I have never been much of beach lover. SO, I am officially hanging up my speedo for awhile and putting on my hiking boots. Not that I can't wear hiking boots with my speedos. Speedos are not just for the beach anymore, I feel that they can pretty much fit comfortably into any social situation.
We have decided to be more fiscally responsible the last few days and forgo the flights into new areas, and instead go to our backpacker roots and use the ground transportation. We took a "mini-bus" (which is in actuality more of a mini-van) for about 5 hours towards the Malaysian border, then hopped a train for roughly 5 hours into Malaysia. I am glad to be able to report that we did not die in a fiery car crash while in the mini-bus. It was touch and go for awhile and I was not sure if that statement was going to be made. Our driver was obviously not paid by the hour since he was determined to make the trip in record time. And since no in S.E. Asia drives well, I think long distance travel via the highway is an extreme sport in this region.
Well, I am going to have to go now. We are going to explore the city and see what trouble we can dig up.
Happy to be alive

Saturday, July 30, 2005

S.E.Asia Travel log 4-5

Subject: Travel log 5?
Hello all. We are safe on dry land again. We have just spent four days on a liveaboard (a diving boat in which you "live a board" instead of going out and back into land). It was called "The Junk". Not because it was an ugly ship or anything, it was a chinese junk that had been restored and is now used as a diving boat. It was awesome. I am like a graceful manatee under the ocean surface. It is like watching an amazing ballet show when I dive. We rented an underwater camera, so later I will have to send around some photos of my underwater majesty. I am seriously considering a run at the 2008 Olympics as a syncrhonized swimmer. We had a pretty serious routine while aboard the boat. Wake up at 7 am, eat a piece of toast and coffee during the dive briefing, gear up and be in the water by 8am. We would dive for about 30 to 60 minutes, return to the boat, eat breakfast, then take about an hour nap. We would then wake up for the next dive briefing and quickly gear up and be back in the water. This would be ended after about 30 to 60 minutes and return to the boat for lunch, followed by an hour nap. Wake up, dive briefing, gear up, in water, eat dinner, go to bed. Diving can really wear you out. It does not seem like you are doing much but floating in the current, but we slept a lot. It was very relaxing and an amazing experience. We saw a sea turtle! I could have just left it at that, but we did see many moray eels, a small octopus, loads of clown fish (nemo), a few sea snakes, and even several leopard sharks. Luckily the leopard sharks are very docile and only cause problems if you startle them or get too close. Luckily for Chad that is. My plan was to thrust Chad into the sharks mouth so I could make a quick get a way. After the first few days we started diving with some irritating people from Scotland, so the pressure was off Chad and onto their annoying son. He was almost shark food even without a shark attack. I would have done it, but I heard it is not good for shark diets to eat humans. I always think of myself as an environmentalist, so I refrained.
I will have to report, before Chad can, I vomitted quite proficiently the first night on the boat. We did not have to meet the boat until 7pm, so Chad and myself killed time by sitting in an Irish pub and drinking beer and watching bad music videos. Excessive alcohol + Land lover + choppy waters = vomit. I think that equation should be emblazoned on posters and tshirts with the likes of E=mc2. Einstein had to get his first big discovery somewhere, and this one is mine. The only thing worse than the first night on choppy waters in a boat, is apparently the first night OFF choppy water on land. I can't take a step without trying to over compensate for a shift in the land under me. I feel like the landscape should keep rocking back and forth. I have not had a single beer since that first night we ventured onto the sea, but with practice and Chad's love and support, I should be back to my usual self in no time.
We are spending a few more nights in Phuket just enjoying the night life and having nothing planned for the rest of our remaining five weeks. We are heading south towards Malaysia and Singapore next, but we have no plans as to getting there or that sort of thing. That is how we like it, and I find it makes the trip more exciting. Hopefully the next email will come from some small village in Malaysia, but if we just decide to keep lazy, it might just all come from this same internet cafe in Phuket. KEEPING IT REAL!
Certified Scuba Diver
Future Olympic Gold Medalist

Thursday, July 21, 2005

S.E.Asia Travel log 3

Hello all. We have arrived in Laos. We flew into Luang Prabang a few days ago. It is my kind of place. Very relaxed and laid back. No little kids trying to sell me crappy bracelets, or adults trying to take me for illicit massages, or even just the ominous sounding, "you want boom-boom?" This last one has an added since of dread since it is mostly asked by old guys. The beer here is cheap and they have a wide selection. They have big bottles of "Beer lao" and little bottles of "Beer Lao". Apparently when the government makes the beer, they have a upper hand in limiting their competition. Luckily Beer Lao is some of the best beer I have tried so far. Our hotel room is a staggering five dollars a night and that is with a tv and air conditioning. I know to most of you American only travelers, that sounds like an understood, but believe me, when travelling the cheap way around the world you definitely look at the room BEFORE you agree to rent it. So far we have spent our entire time here in Laos walking around and exploring this small village, it is pretty cool. Almost every corner has a Vat (which is a Buddhist temple). All the monks are about an average of 15 years old and love to try out their English. They all the ask the same questions, and usually in the same order. "Where are you coming from? How long are you being here in Luang Prabang? How are you liking the city? How long are you going to be here? Do you have a wife? Do you have a girlfriend? What is your name?" After all those questions are finished it usually is followed by a long and awkward silence. Some have managed to say, "You are fat?" I usually just respond, "yes". Then I go on a rampage and knock over every statue of Budha within a ten foot radius. Actually I just say, yes, and smile and then walk away. I don't think they intend their question to be mean, I just think they really have not encountered overweight people very often. I am going to start a foundation when I get back stateside to search out overweight people and send them to Southeast Asia on group tours in order to enrich the lives of the local peoples. Considering the way the locals are excited every time I sit down in one of their cheap plastic restaurant chairs, and it doesn't break, I think they would start cheering if a whole group were to do this at once.
I will keep you all informed of this future business plan, and I fully expect you all to send all your obese friends to me for customers. And Bam, I will give you a discount.
Michael Williams
President and Founder
Tubby Tours International

Thursday, July 14, 2005

S.E.Asia travel log 2

Hello from Cambodia. We caught a flight from Bangkok into Siem Reap (where all the temples are located). It is great. Everything is old and decrepit, a lot like the patients on a med surg floor. I only have a few minutes to type, I am about to catch a flight out back to Bangkok. I am a huge celebrity here in Cambodia, They are mesmerized by my size. They are continuously calling me "Big Show", apparently he is a popular US wrestler. Wrestling is apparently the number one past time here. I am not exagerating when I say that everyone stops what they are doing and gawks at me when we walk down the street. It gets pretty irritating after a few days. We spent some time on the beach in Sihanoukville, it was sandy and I am sunburned. I am much more of a mountain person than a beach person. I must go now, if I stay on the computer much longer it will cost me more money. I will leave you with my favorite question to date. "when big like you sleep all the time?"
See you all later.

Thursday, July 07, 2005

S.E. Asia Travel log 1

Howdy all, we are officially in Thailand. We spent a massive 24+ hours travelling here. The plane was very uncomfortable and I wanted to jump out of the window, but the stewardess on Korean Airlines are very nice and very eager to keep everyone happy. We arrived in Bangkok and at first it seemed like I was still in america. Except, that all the cab drivers where touching my arms as I walked by and making comments about me being so large. I could easily crush them all and be the new king of Thailand. That is my back up plan if I get bored. Our hotel is very expensive. It is 450 baht a night. That is about ten american dollars. We decided to splurge. There actually are rooms for around 3 american dollars, but then you are pretty much sleeping in a barracks style room with a bunch of people. Apparently you can also just sleep on the street. I am having a suit custom tailored. They have a tailor shop about every fifteen feet. It is costing me about 125 american dollars. It would be less, but apparently they think it would take a lot of fabric to cover my ass. Everything has been great so far. The people are incredibly nice and all stare at me. It doesnt help matters that I shaved my head into a mohawk because I was bored. You can get a barber shop here to shave your head and face for about 75 cents. It is the good life and I might never come home.
I will try and send some pictures when I have more time. We are about to catch a flight into Cambodia to see the temples at Ankgor Wat.
Talk at you more later