There's One In Every Crowd

Liz concludes:

There's one in every crowd- and I fear it may be me.

Ten ways to ascertain if you're the one:

1. When someone farts and tries to play it off, you call him on it no matter how many others are around
2. When you get tired of listening, you say, "I'm tired of listening."
3. You stick your finger in the best donut so no one else can claim it
4. When someone you don't like sits beside you, you move
5. You openly curse other people's good fortune
6. You call your parents when you're expecting another call so you don't have to stay on the phone very long
7. You stare at a guy's lazy eye and bob your head to see if it will follow you
8. You shrug off getting busted trying to use expired coupons as ignorance
9. You never open your own beer
10. You harshly judge people with toddlers
11. If you don't like your fortune, you force someone to trade cookies with you
12. You delight in fat/drug addicted/bankrupt/incarcerated celebrities
13. You give a loud warning before the movie starts that talkers will be prosecuted
14. You have a "poker playing" outfit
15. You also have "drinking britches"
16. Your top ten list contains 16 items

These are not all me. But these have, at one time, all been me. Again, I have to remind you, I'm not proud. Just honest.