Liz winces
In order to prove I'm American I plan on gaining 10, no 15 pounds over the holidays. I like to leave no doubt that I'm more patriotic than everyone else.
To help me reach this goal I made some homemade eggnog this weekend. I think there was a scene in Rocky or one of Stallone's porns- probably both- where he drank some raw eggs. As a direct result, raw eggs turn me off. For my nog I found a recipe that allows you to pasteurize, but not fully cook, the eggs. Don't think this is easy. Eggs are a chicken's gift to the breakfast meal so you have to pour the hot milk and cream into the egg and sugar mix very delicately.
I've always been a little heavy handed when it comes to pouring.
The chunks really aren't that big...especially if you shake vigorously before pouring and I learned a really valuable lesson. You CAN have bourbon with your breakfast and it is FANTASTIC!
When I was in high school I tried a variety of "natural" hair remedies. Coffee grounds to accentuate the brunette locks, mayonnaise for shine, beer for strong healthy hair and raw eggs for luster. What I didn't know then that I do know now is that a hot shower will cook eggs too. It was a devastating day when I had thousands of egg pieces floating around in my hair. Thousands of tiny cooked embryo from the scalp all the way down to the ends- and my hair was almost to my waist. I smelled like an under seasoned omelet for at least two days.
No wonder I have egg issues.
I had another food moment come to mind as I was writing this post. Have you ever seen pickled pig's feet in the convienience store? They will pickle any damn part of a pig there is, probably including the asshole, but I know including the lips. Pickled pig lips. No lie. One night in college a friend brought some pickled pig lips over to E's house. We had great fun throwing them at stop signs and pedestrians on the way home.
I feel guilty about that now. Can you imagine how tramatic it would be to be blind-sided by a pickled pig's lip on your walk home? I guess it's better than getting bombarded with a pickled pig's asshole.
