Wednesday, March 21, 2007

No Post For You!

I think I have officially broken my brain. I have been working non-stop since returning from Vegas and I can't remember who I am.

I was driving home this morning and could not remember what day of the week it was. I thought it was Tuesday, but my watch said Wednesday. Then I started to freak out because I thought I had only posted one post since the weekend. It was not that I was upset about not posting, but I was concerned that I did not remember where the day went.
I guess when you spend every night taking care of the same vegetative patients, every fecal covered ass starts to look alike. I used to be able to see the beauty in each and every poopy ass, but now the magic is gone.

In my Birthday post I mentioned having fun with our Schizophrenic patient. Well, we do actually have one, and it turns out her Birthday is the same as mine. Her nurse wanted to give her a piece of my Birthday cake (a beautiful Barbie cake, I got to lick the icing off the nipples.), but her husband said, rather vehemently, "She can NOT have a piece of cake. That will make her placenta fall out." When I heard that I was afraid to eat my piece. After the husband left the nurse gave her a piece anyway. I don't know about her, but my placenta never fell out, so I think that husband is full of shit.

There is no love like crazy love.

10 comments:

Churlita said...

You make love seem so grand. if only I could find someone who would guard my placenta against the evils of birthday cake.Sigh.

Mel Francis said...

THAT'S what happened to my placenta! DAMNED birthday cake!

heather said...

her ~placenta~ will fall out!!?? is she pregnant? and why the concern over the placenta and not the baby if she is? how odd. sounds like you need to get some rest. working non-stop for days/weeks on end can only lead to tears. take a personal day and just chill. the crazies will still be there when you get back.

othurme said...

I think he said polenta.

judy said...

I think the schizophrenia is rubbing off...

Burg said...

Naw.. He meant pimenta.

Liz said...

I applaud your ability to use the word placenta in a post about cake. Even though this was not truly your design, it was beautiful nonetheless.

Mayren said...

That is hella funny.
omgwtfbbq.

apositivepessimist said...

whoaah...so schizo's actually have placenta's?

Chris said...

Now I know what to tall all the prego people @ work to avoid. NOW I really can eat all the b-day cake by myself