Sunday, February 18, 2007

My Bar, Your Stories

Liz Steals An Idea From Heather:

On Heather's blog she outlined her dream bar. I don't know if that is the sure fire sign that you're an alcoholic or not, but my BFF and I have done the same thing. Kim's idea is more clever. She wants to open a bar beside every Hooters in the country. This bar is called "Tight Ends" and all the waiters are hot young lads in football pants- only. It caters to women so that while their husbands are ogling the boobs next door, the ladies can be ogling the tight ends serving up their Cosmos. Cute idea, isn't it?

My bar is called "Stories". It's a multi-leveled establishment that follows the concept of that 80's hairstyle, the mullet: business in the front, party in the back. Downstairs is your "come spend daddy's money" bar: a stage, cute twenty-somethings pouring drinks, loud music, complete with ladies' nights, MTV Spring Break inspired games and two-for-one deals. The decor is almost space-age it's so modern; so techno. Plasma screens are everywhere and you order your drinks using your cell phone, blackberry, or the computer monitors stationed at each table. Come in, have drinks, hook up.

As you progress up the thick wooden stairs, so do you progress through the stages of life. The second story is for thirty-somethings. HGTV, ESPN and MSNBC are on the TVs. The music is not as loud. You have a mix of alt-country and 80's rock playing in the background as you sit in comfortable but funky chairs with friends and share stories over cocktails made with Grey Goose. There are pool tables and TV trivia. Come in, have drinks, meet new friends.

The third story is a bar with fine dining. Bring your wife, come here for a date, meet after work for drinks with clients. It's more upscale with a cigar bar, superb wine list, and salt-water aquarium. Come in, have drinks, connect.

The final story of the bar is "the artists gallery". This is a small area that is decorated more like a living room that like a bar, although there is one bartender present at all times. This room is a creative think tank. We have some Internet stations set up so that you can write while having your martini or coffee, we sponsor weekly conversations in this room where we have political discussions or artist workshops. We have cooking demonstrations where use food as a springboard for conversation. We have "sit down" comedy- where the patrons come and, in karaoke type fashion, lay their "rooster and waterfall" jokes on this crowd- this intimate group of witty and intelligent patrons. The sponsored events are by invitation only. Snobby, I know, but I don't want some lame ass thinking that this is too serious. We still have fun. After all, I find creativity springs from laughter. Come in, have drinks, create a bit.

The last story of the building, which is level 5 for those of you playing at home, is the office but it's main function is being a hotel. Small, with only 6 rooms, but still a place to crash for the night after multi-leveled drinking. The rooms would be expensive, but nice and the kitchen makes sure that you have a hearty hot breakfast sent to your room anytime between midnight and 10 am. All breakfasts include a bloody mary or a mimosa. Come in, sleep it off, start over.

I have it all planned. All that's lacking is the $14 million to get it up and running.

3 comments:

Killer said...

We should start a collection. I will offer twenty bucks, if I can get an invitation to the top floor.

heather said...

cool!!! i had a blog idea good enough for liz to steal! yeah baby!
love both bars, killer has a good one over at my place in the comments section. brat (my sister) used to tell me i just wanted a zoo i could party at. still sounds good to me.

EEK said...

That would be the perfect place for me to facilitate my descent into alcoholism. I like it.