Sunday, April 22, 2007

Five Questions (From Jester)

Our good friend Jester was asked five questions, so he was kind enough to ask us five as well.

1. What is your favorite body part and why? Difficulty: Can NOT be a part normally covered by underwear.
This could have been such an easy and obvious answer, especially since I don't wear underwear. But, since I know where Jester was intending with that last part, I will honor the intent.
I am going to have say my "man-boobs". Most men would say this is a bad body part, but I enjoy their squishy, loving warmth. I like to imagine that one day, if I try really hard, they can be as big as Liz's woman-boobs.

2. Describe the circumstances surrounding your first sexual experience. Bonus points for a homosexual experience.
My first sexual experience was not homosexual, but in retrospect, I guess she did kind of look a bit mannish. My first experience was with a younger, but much more experienced lass. She made the first move, then the second and pretty much did all the work. For all the effort she put into it, the pay off must have been dismal. She was dating someone else at the time, and I was actually a friend of that guy. Many years later we would repeat our tryst, and ironically, after having spent several years apart from that original boyfriend, she was now engaged to him. I think karma would allow him a good swift kick to my nards.

3. If you could choose one living celebrity to become friends with, who would you choose and why?
Jack Black. I think he is really funny, and he is really into music. I bet he could get us backstage at all the best concerts. I think it is always a good idea to hang out with someone who is equal, or worse than, your own physical conditioning.

4. If you were told you could only listen to three albums on repeat from your collection for the next two years, what albums are less likely to drive you insane?
Tenacious D (tenacious d). The last question really put me into a Jack Black mood. This is a hilarious album, plus it rocks.
Weezer (the blue album). Rivers Cuomo was a close second to Jack Black. This is probably one of my favorite albums of all time.
Nirvana (nevermind). After being thoroughly disillusioned with Glam Rock. This album made me realize that music was more than just noise and hair spray.

5. You've lived many places.... Which city is your favorite? Which is your least favorite? Write a short paragraph (as if for a travel magazine) selling or dissuading others from moving there.
Missoula, Montana is ,by far, one of the greatest places to live in America, nay, the world. I moved there, for no real reason, after nursing school. It is a college town, an artsy town, and a party town. The University of Montana pumps out a large number of graduates who refuse to leave this small town, this creates a service industry that is second to none. Where else in the world can you walk into a convenience store at 3am and have 2 hour debate with the clerk about existentialism? A beautiful mountain range rings Missoula, offering it a much milder winter than the rest of Montana, as well as, offering a spectacular view.
Tupelo, Mississippi is, hands down, the worst place I have ever lived. "The birth place of Elvis" is their claim to fame, and since that one monumental event so long ago, nothing has ever happened in this town again. If the United States has a butt crack, Tupelo is the dingleberry clinging tenaciously to it's butt hair. I spent six slow, agonizing months working here, it seemed like six years. It is the town that keeps mullets thriving and George W. Bush in office. Yeah, Elvis was born there, but he got the hell out of town as soon as he could walk.

You too can get in on the fun of the FIVE QUESTIONS
Here are the Interview Meme rules:
1. Leave me a comment saying, “Interview me.”
2. I will respond by emailing you five questions. I get to pick the questions.
3. You will update your blog with the answers to the questions.
4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

On a side note, I tried to track this meme back through all the links to so where it started. I managed to get back through TWELVE friggin other blogs, before I realized, I did not want to go any further. It took me longer to track back than it did to answer these questions. I was going to link back through them all, but I am too damn lazy.


Liz said...

I feel like such a Jackass for forgetting to say "Jack Black" as my celebrity dinner guest.

Would you quit comparing your boobs to mine? Please? I'm begging ya.

heather said...

ok killer, repeat after me, 'i must, i must , i must increase my bust'. lol.
is it wrong to feel proud of my birth state for being the location of your favorite town? :-)

Jester said...

1. Try rubbing toilet paper between your man-boobs once a day. It worked for your ass, right?

2. Does the friend know about the tryst? (Btw, stay away from UMB you cheating SOB!)

3. As much as I like Jack, I get the feeling that I'd want to strangle him after about an hour.

4. I never got the whole Nirvana thing. It was alright, but hardly the rebirth of music.

5. Montana is beautiful. But as I have an aversion to snow/cold/freezing my nads off I'll let you have it.

I've been through Tupelo. Glad I didn't stop.

Thanks for playing along! I look forward to the Newlywed Game questions. :)

Killer said...

It is an old, fat lady trick from the South that you put a slice of bread under each boob to absorb the moisture, plus you can snack during the day.

MMMM, delicious moist bread with yeasty boob cheese.

Anonymous said...

I'm game for an interview.

JLeonard said...

Interview me.