Wednesday, November 08, 2006

Because Celebrity-Themed Products Sell, That's Why

Liz sees opportunity to capitalize on famous figures:

I'm going to go ahead an apologize for this...
  • The JFK douche: comes in Camelot scent and Monroe Madness
  • Mohammad Ali 35 mm bullets: They fly like a butterfly, sting like a bee
  • The Pee Wee Herman line of training condoms
  • The M Night Shyamalan circumcision kit: Did some yell "Cut?"
  • Ted Haggard Brand So Very Conservative lip stick: Who's had more practice with sticks on his lips than THIS guy? *Only color: blushing nude
  • The Ben Stiller merkin: Available in straight or curly
  • The Janet Jackson suit of armor: Don't go medieval on someone's ass without one. **Now with easy to remove breast plate!
  • The George Bush air matress- self-inflates
  • Magnum PI mustache rides (sold only in adult stores)
  • Available at Baskin Robbins everywhere: The Beyonce Shake
  • The Sadam Hussein Line of Quality Men's Lounge Wear: for hanging out in
  • The Tara Reed Line of Sub-Quality Women's Lounge Wear: for hanging out of
  • The Shakespear Parkinsons cure: still in trials but works on Chihuahuas!
  • The Nicole Richie diet: be so annoying even food rejects you
  • Donald Rumsfeld's Guide to Knowing When It's Time To Quit

Point taken.


Liz said...

In answer to the Ted Haggard question, see Killer's post below.

mist1 said...

Ever since I bought the limited edition white OJ Bronco, I have loved celebrity themed products.

Question: Did your font get smaller, or did I get older.

Hint: Answer this question carefully.

Killer said...

I am going to kick Mist in the nuts. I had a great OJ product. Screw it.

OJ relationship counseling: Sometimes you just gotta kill a bitch.

Margaret said...

liz, will you still blog when she's rich?

Liz said...

Mist: Killer emailed me to also "inquire" (read: RANT) about my small font. Hummmm... I don't see a difference on my computer, but I'll see if selecting a larger size makes it easier for my more mature readers to see.

Killer, I thought that relationship that went sour was a secret only you, me, Disco, and the Las Vegas desert were susppossed to know about!


Are you refering to Liz in a confusing second person format so that she'll respond in third? Or are you talking to Killer, Liz's fourth person personality? Either way, my Snoop-Dog magic 8-ball says "yes".