Tuesday, November 21, 2006

How Can I Get Google To Appreciate Me?

Liz spies on herself and doesn't like what she doesn't see:

Recently, National Public Radio had a story on how potential employers use Google and My Space to "snoop" on perspective employees. Hummmm... although I'm not looking for a new job it did make me wonder what is floating around in cyberspace about me. So, not having a My Space profile (this is a perpetual statement, by the way) I Googled myself.

I am nowhere to be found.

I was once on the first page of "Liz" hits. I had a job and a fancy title and was pretty easy to locate. Now that I've left that job my Internet identity has apparently left too. My stock has plummeted.

What if a potential suitor is using the Internet to make sure I don't have any adult films for download or have a notorious reputation for living outside the law? Will he be disappointed, even discouraged, if there is NOTHING out there about me?

To summarize: You can find pictures of rhinos humping, instructions for growing mold, dozens of websites dedicated to Three's Company, and pictures of the wonderful world of deli meat on the Internet but NOTHING about me? I can understand Googling your grandmother and getting "nada" hits, but I'm a product of the technology-driven, information-geared generation. We THRIVE on knowing that we're being marketed without our own consent. Yet I have somehow been left anonymously behind.

Am I a........ loser?

How can I get back in this critical loop without exposing a breast, leading a revolution, getting an award for quilting or being arrested?

**Friends should not interpret this post as an invitation to put pictures or stories on the web.


othur-me said...

I don't think there is any way to do it without exposing a breast, so try that.

Killer said...

That would be a pretty bizarre suicide note..."To google I am nothing!"

mist1 said...

Ego surfing never leads to happiness.

othur-me said...

Anyways, how is someone supposed to google you if you won't lay still?